The Last Kicks, Tricks, and Schticks
of Fleur de Tease Season Six

Starting the evening off at a friend’s French Quarter Condo for cocktails seemed like a good idea….

Our buddy Kirk, owner and president of NOLA Brewing, tends to accompany us more often than not to burly-q events and our favorite shutterbug had not seen his brandy new condo – so Tonya thought, “of course we should invite Kirk to the Fleur de Tease season finale” and “of course we should go to his place for tasty beverages first.” And thus began our evening.

As we moseyed down to One Eyed Jacks for the early show, I thought to myself, “maybe the tasty beverages were not such a brilliant idea” … I blame Kirk…maybe Tonya.

Fleur de Tease’s sixth season had come to its end and they were going out with a bang. They promised a night of performer’s faves and some new hot solos. We had a table reserved down front and I was feelin’ fine.

The inimitable Chris Lane was our host for the evening and he was on fire. Well, I thought he was hilarious – it may have been the booze, but the crowd was laughing as much as me.

Bella Blue opened the show as a hapless dancer who could not make her tassels twirl no matter how much guidance she got from Roxie le Rouge, Natasha Fiore and Magic Mike (?!). Finally, she prevailed by creating what may have been a new art form that I feel privileged to have witnessed the birth of… asseling. That girl can spin tassels on her buns better than most can on their boobs. It was crazy cool.

Madame Mystere continued the fun in what was either strangely beautiful or beautifully strange. Dressed as Sasquatch, she came loping out on stage and there was no way you would think this was going to be sexy, but she made it happen. Stepping into a bathtub, Lady Bigfoot pours herself a glass of wine and cleverly “shaves” off her suit revealing the always gorgeous Mystere.

This was around the time I finished yet another beverage and decided water was a good idea, at least I had some wits about me because at this point in my notes started to make less sense the next day. And my already atrocious handwriting got noticeably worse. I blame Kirk… and Tonya.

The always entertaining Mystic Pony Aerial Troupe was represented by two of its members; Sarah the Bobcat and Niki Frisky. Niki’s rocker solo on an aerial hoop set to “Crimson and Clover” certainly got me fired up and Sarah’s trapeze performance was excellent, but their act together… WOW! Their sapphic bodies intertwined on a single hoop moving celestially in sync left me wanting more, and by that, I don’t mean the act was lacking in any way.

I have said it before and I will say it again, Trixie Minx delights me. Dressed as Marie Antoinette and dancing to “It’s Oh So Quiet’ by Björk, Trixie played to the crowd with every “hush”. She was funny, sexy…quite simply, perfection. Trixie was followed by Natasha Fiore with her gypsy fortune teller strip. As Natasha progressed from classic strip to fire dance, I realized that in the many times I have seen Natasha, this was the first time I had seen her perform with fire. That seems crazy – it was divine. Fearlessly dragging the flames across her body, Natasha gave us what was essentially a beautiful fan dance – on fire.

Our evening continued with the comedic prestidigitation of Magic Mike and his “mePad”. Mike is always funny even if they are old jokes- charming overpowers corny every time. Tonight his magic made clever use of an iPad, real balloon animals materializing from his electronic drawings. After Mike was a zany group act with Bella, Natasha and Mystere. This hip-hop space adventure was Intergalactic Fuckin Fantastic.

As Roxie took the stage for her “Keeping up with the Jetsons” number, our lovely waitress came by and asked about another round. Kirk complied and neglected to remember my switch to water… I blame him. I have seen this act from Roxie before, but it still amazes me. Futuristic angry robot hip-hop(ish) burlesque en pointe. Seriously, what?! It is AWESOME! I don’t know if it is my favorite Roxie number, but it is certainly up there.

The show ended with number fit for a Vegas revue. Five of the best asses in New Orleans shaking feathers and shimmying fringe. Not a strip, merely a dance. It was the perfect way to wrap up the show and the season. Thank you ladies and gentlemen for a highly entertaining evening.

Until next time people, good night.

P.S. We had to be ushered out after by Chris so they could get ready for the late show. Chris, I am sorry – I blame Kirk…and maybe Tonya.